Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
