He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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