I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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