I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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