White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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