i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
