"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
