This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize