You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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