Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
