I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
