yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
