Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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