You're my little dorito
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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