it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
