Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
the gays at disneyland are vicious
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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