Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
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It's never too late to be topless.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize