remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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