I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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