it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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