Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize