dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
