Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
