But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
