So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize