we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize