When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize