If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
