I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
