I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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