went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
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Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
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I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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