Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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