i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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