i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
