he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
