I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
