shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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