no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
