State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
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