We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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