my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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