My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
