i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
