I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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