You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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