if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
