My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
