no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
