so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
