I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
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