Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
True strength comes from lack of pants
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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